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GOOD MORNING BALTIMORE
TRACY
Oh, oh, oh
Woke up today
Feeling the way I always do
Oh, oh, oh
Hungry for
something
That I can't eat
Then I hear that beat
The rhythm of town
Starts calling me down
It's
like a message from
High above
Oh, oh, oh
Pulling me out
To the smiles and the
Streets that I love
TRACY (& ENSEMBLE)
Good morning Baltimore
Every day's like an open door
Every night is a fantasy
Every
sound's like a symphony
Good morning Baltimore
And some day when I take to the floor
The world's gonna
wake up and see
Baltimore and me
Oh, oh, oh
Look at my hair
What "do" can compare with mine today?
Oh,
oh, oh,
I've got my hairspray and radio
I'm ready to go
The rats on the street
All
dance round my feet
They seem to say
"Tracy, it's up to you"
So, oh, oh
Don't hold me back
'Cause today
all my dreams will come true
Good morning Baltimore
There's the flasher who lives next door
There's the bum
on his bar room stool
They wish me luck on my way to school
Good morning Baltimore
And some day when I
take to the floor
The world's gonna wake up and see
Baltimore and me
I know every step
I know every song
I know there's a place where I belong
I see all those party lights shining ahead
So someone invite me
Before I
drop dead!
ENSEMBLE
Before she drops dead!
TRACY (& ENSEMBLE)
So, Oh, Oh
Give me a chance
'Cause
when I start to dance i'm a movie star
Oh, oh, oh
Something inside of me makes me move
When I hear the
groove
My ma tells me no
But my feet tell me go!
It's like a drummer inside my heart
Oh, oh, oh
Don't
make me wait
One more moment for my life to start...
ENSEMBLE
Good morning, good morning
Waiting for my
life to start
TRACY (& ENSEMBLE)
I love you Baltimore
Every day's like an open door
Every night is
a fantasy
Every sound's like a symphony
And I promise Baltimore
That some day when
I take to the
floor
The world's gonna wake up and see
Gonna wake up and see
Baltimore and me...
ENSEMBLE
Yes, More
Or Less We All Agree
TRACY
Baltimore and me...
ENSEMBLE
Someday the world
Is gonna see
TRACY
Baltimore and me!
THE NICEST KIDS IN TOWN
CORNY
Hey there, Teenage Baltimore!
Don't change that channel!
'Cause it's time for the Corny
Collins Show! Brought to you by
Ultra Clutch Hairspray!
CORNY (& COUNCIL MEMBERS)
Ev'ry afternoon
When
the clock strikes four
(bop-bee-ba, ba-ba-ba-ba, bee-ba)
A crazy bunch of kids
Crash through that door
(bop-bee-ba,
ba-ba-ba-ba, bee-ba)
They throw off their coats
And leave the squares behind
And then they shake it, shake
it, shake it
Like they're losing their mind
You'll never see them frown
'Cause they're the nicest kids in town
Every
afternoon
You turn your T.V. on
(na, na, na, na, na, na-na-na-na)
And we know you turn the sound up
When
your parents are gone, yeah
(na, na, na, na, na, na-na-na-na)
And then you twist and shout
For your favorite
star
And once you've practiced every step
That's in your repertoire
You better come on down
And meet the nicest
kids in town
Nice white kids
Who like to lead the way
And once a month
We have our "negro day!"
And I'm
the man who keeps it spinnin' round
Mr. Corny Collins
With the latest, greatest Baltimore sound!!
So every
afternoon
Drop everything
(bop-bee-ba, ba-ba-ba-ba, bee-ba)
Who needs to read and write
When you can dance
and sing?
(bop-bee-ba, ba-ba-ba-ba, bee-ba)
Forget about your algebra
And calculus
You can always do your
homework
On the morning bus
Can't tell a verb from a noun
They're the nicest kids in town
Roll Call!!
COUNCIL
MEMBERS
I'm Amber!
Brad!
Tammy!
Fender!
Brenda!
Sketch!
Shelley!
I.Q.
Lou Ann!
And I'm...LINK!
(All
of the girls scream.)
CORNY (& COUNCIL MEMBERS)
So, if every night you're shaking
As you lie in bed
(mony-mony,
ooh, mony-mony)
And the bass and drums
Are pounding in your head
(mony-mony, ooh, mony-mony)
Who cares about
sleep
When you can snooze in
School?
They'll never get to college
But they sure look cool
Don't need
a cap and a gown
'Cause they're the nicest
Kids in town
They're the nicest. Nicest
They're the nicest,
nicest
They're the sugar 'n' spicest,
The nicest kids in...
Kids in town!
MAMA, I'M A BIG GIRL NOW
PRUDY
Don't contradict me!
VELMA
Don't disobey me!
EDNA
Don't even think about
going to
that audition.
TRACY, PENNY & AMBER
Please!
MOMS
No!
GIRLS
Mother!!!!
MOMS
Stop!
PENNY
Stop telling me what to do
MOMS
Don't!
AMBER
Don't treat me
like a child of two
MOMS
No!
TRACY
I know that you want what's best
MOMS
Please!
TRACY
But mother, please,
GIRLS
Give it a rest!!!
ALL
Stop! Don't! No! Please!
Stop! Don't! No!
Please!
Stop! Don't! No! Please!
Mama. I'm a big girl now!
TRACY
Once upon a time when I was just
a kid
You never let me do iust what the older kids did
But lose that laundry list of what you won't allow
GIRLS
'Cause mama, I'm a big girl now
AMBER
Once upon a time I used to play with toys
But now I'd rather
play around with teenage boys
So, if I get a hickey, please don't have a cow
GIRLS
'Cause mama, I'm a
big girl now
PENNY
Ma, I gotta tell you that without a doubt
I get my best dancing lessons from you
You're
the one who taught me how to "twist and shout"
Because you shout non-stop
And you're so twisted too!
Wo -oh -oh
-oh -oh
TRACY
Once I used to fidget
'Cause I just sat home
AMBER
But now I'm just like
gidget
And I gotta get to Rome!
PENNY
So say, arrivederci!
TRACY
Toodle-loo!
AMBER
And ciao!
GIRLS
'Cause mama, I'm a big girl now
ALL
Stop! Don't! No! Please!
Stop! Don't!
No! Please!
Stop! Don't! No! Please!
GIRLS
Mama, i'm a big girl now
(hey mama, say mama)
TRACY
Once upon a time I was a shy young thing
Could barely walk and talk so much as dance and sing
But let me
hit that stage, I wanna take my bow
GIRLS
'Cause mama, I'm a big girl now
AMBER
Wo - oh - oh
- oh - oh
Once upon a time I used to dress up 'ken'
But now that I'm a woman, I like bigger men
And I
don't need a barbie doll to show me how
GIRLS
'Cause mama, I'm a big girl now
GIRLS
Ma, you always
taught me
What was right from wrong
And now I iust wanna give it a try
Mama, I've been in the nest for far
too long
So please give a push and mama watch me fly
AMBER
Watch me fly
GIRLS
Hey, mama, say mama
PENNY
Someday I will meet a man
You won't condemn
AMBER
And we will have some kids
And
you can torture them
TRACY
But let me be a star
Before I take that vow
GIRLS
'Cause mama,
I'm a big girl now
PENNY
Oh - Oh - Oh
GIRLS
Mama, I'm a big girl now
AMBER
Hey - Hey -
Hey
GIRLS
Mama, I'm a big girl
AMBER
Ooh, such a big, big girl!
GIRLS
I'm a big girl now
ALL
Stop! Don't! No! Please!
Stop! Don't! No! Please!
Stop! Don't! No! Please!
GIRLS
Mama,
I'm a big girl now!!!
I CAN HEAR THE BELLS
TRACY
I can hear the bells
PENNY
Tracy, are you all right?
TRACY
Well, don'tcha hear
them chime?
PENNY
I don't hear anything.
TRACY
Can't 'cha feel my heartbeat keeping perfect time?
And
all because he...
Touched me
He looked at me and stared, yes he
Bumped me
My heart was unprepared when
he
Tapped me
And knocked me off my feet
One little touch
Now my life's complete 'cause when he
Nudged
me
Love put me in a fix, yes it
Hit me
Just like a ton of bricks, yes my
Heart burst
Now I know what
life's about
One little touch
And love's knocked me out and,
TRACY (& ENSEMBLE)
I can hear the bells
My head is spinning
I can hear the bells
Something's beginning
Everybody says
That a girl who looks
like me
Can't win his love
Well, just wait and see 'cause
I can hear the bells
Just hear them chiming
I can hear the bells
My temp'rature's climbing
I cant contain my joy
'Cause I fin'ly found the boy
I've been missin'
Listen!
I can hear the bells
Round one
He'll ask me on a date and
then
Round two
I'll primp, but won't late because
Round three's
When we kiss inside his car
Won't go all the
way
But I'll go pretty far!
And then,
Round four
He'll ask me for my hand and then
Round five
We'll
book the wedding band so by
Round six
Amber, much to your surprise
This heavyweight champion
Takes the prize
and...
I can hear the bells
My ears are ringing
I can hear the bells
The bridesmaids are singing
Everybody
says
Thet a guy who's such a gem
Won't look my way
Well, the laugh's on them 'cause
I can hear the bells
My
father will smile
I can hear the bells
As he walks me down the aisle
My mother starts to cry
But I
can't see 'cause Link and I
Are french kissin'
Listen!
I can hear the bells
I can hear the bells
My head is reeling
I can hear the bells
I can't stop the pealing
Everybody warns
That he won't like
what he'll see
But I know that he'll look
Inside of me yeah,
I can hear the bells
Today's just the
start 'cause
I can hear the bells
And 'til death do us part
And even when we die
We'll look down from
up above
Remembering the night
That we two fell in love
We both will share a tear
And he'll whisper as
we're reminiscin'
Listen!
I can hear the bells
ENSEMBLE
She can hear the bells
TRACY
I can hear
the bells
ENSEMBLE
She can hear the bells
TRACY
I can hear the bells
ENSEMBLE
Bum, bum, bum,
bum!
IT TAKES TWO
COUNCIL GUYS
Оон, оон, оон, оон,
оон
Оон, оон, оон, оон
It
takes two
Оон.оон, оон, оон.оон,
оон
Doo doo, wop!
LINK
They say it's a man's world
Well, that cannot be denied
But
what good's a man's world
Without a woman by your side
And so I will wait
Until that moment you decide
LINK
& GUYS
That I'm your man
And you're my girl
That I'm the sea
And you're the pearl
It takes two, baby,
It takes two
Doo doo - wop!
LINK
A king ain't a king
Without the pow'r behind the throne
A prince
is a pauper. Babe,
Without a chick to call his own
So please, darling, choose me
I don't wanna rule alone
Tell
me,
LINK & GUYS
I'm your king
And you're my queen
That no one else
Can come between
It takes
two, baby,
It takes two
GUYS
Don't you know
LINK
Lancelot had Guinevere
Mrs. Claus has old
St. Nick
Romeo had Juliet
And Liz, well, she has her Dick
They say it takes two to tango
Well, that tango's
child's play
So take me to the dance floor
And we'll twist the night away
Just like Frankie Avalon
Had
his favorite mouseketeer
I dream of a lover, babe,
To say the things I long to hear
So come closer baby,
Oh and whisper in my ear
TRACY (in anything but a whisper)
Yeah!
LINK
That you're my girl
And
I'm your boy
That you're my pride
And I'm your joy
That I'm the sand
And you're the tide
I'll be the groom
If you'll be my bride
It takes two, baby,
It takes two
TRACY (& GUYS)
I'm your girl (you're my
girl)
You're my boy (i'm your boy)
You're my pride
I'm your joy
I'm the sand
You're the tide
Be the
groom
I'll be your bride (be my bride)
It takes two...
It takes two...
LINK
It takes two, baby
TRACY & LINK
It takes two
GUYS
...Two - oo - оон!
WELCOME TO THE 60'S
TRACY
Hey mama hey mama,
Look around
Everybody's groovin' to a brand new sound
Hey mama
hey mama,
Follow me
I know something's in you
That you wanna set free
So let so, go, go of the past now
Say hello to the love in your heart
Yes, I know that the world's spinning fast now
You gotta get yourself
a brand new start
TRACY, DYNAMITES & ENSEMBLE
Hey mama, welcome to the 60's
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,
oh
Oh mama, welcome to the 60's
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
Go mama, go, go, go!
DYNAMITES & ENSEMBLE
Welcome to the 60's
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,
Hey mama
Yeah, yeah, yeah,
Yeah, yeah, yeah
TRACY
Hey mama, hey mama,
Take my hand
EDNA
First let's make a pit stop
At the wiener stand
TRACY
Hey mama, hey mama,
Take a chance
EDNA
Oh Tracy, it's been years
Since someone asked me to dance
TRACY
So let go, so, go of the past now
Say hello to the light in your eyes
Yes, I know that the world's
Spinning
fast now
But you gotta run the race
To win the prize
TRACY, DYNAMITES &, ENSEMBLE
Hey mama, welcome
to the 60's
Oh, oh, oh, oh. Oh, oh, oh, oh
Oh mama, welcome to the 60's
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
Go mama,
go, go, go!
DYNAMITES & ENSEMBLE
Welcome to the 60's
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,
Hey mama
Yeah, yeah,
yeah,
Yeah, yeah, yeah
(Tracy & Edna arrive at Mr. Pinky's Hefty Hideaway
as new fans besiege Tracy for
photos and autographs.)
DYNAMITES
Welcome to the rhythm of a brand new day
TRACY
Take your old-fashioned
fears
TRACY & DYNAMITES
And just throw them away
MR. PINKY'S STAFF
You should add some color and
a fresh new "do"
DYNAMITES & ENSEMBLE
'Cause it's time for a star
Who looks just like you!
JUDINE
Dont'cha let nobody
Try to steal your fun
'Cause a little touch of lipstick
Never hurt no one
KAMILAH
The future's got a million roads
For you to choose
But you'll walk a little taller
In some high-heel shoes
SHAYNA
And once you find the style
That makes you feel like you
Something fresh
Something new
DYNAMITES
& ENSEMBLE
Step on out
Hear us shout
TRACY, DYNAMITES & ENSEMBLE
Mama, that's your cue!!!
ENSEMBLE
Yeah, Yeah, Yeah
(Edna emerges from Mr. Pinky's Hefty Hideaway all brand new.)
EDNA
Hey Tracy, hey
baby,
Look at me!
I'm the cutest chickie
That ya ever did see
Hey Tracy, hey baby,
Look at us
Where
is there a team
That's half as fabulous?!
(Tracy takes her turn in "Mr. Pinky's".)
EDNA (& ENSEMBLE)
I let go, go. Go of the past now
Said hello to this red carpet ride
Yes I know that the world's spinning
fast now
Tell lollabrigida to step aside!
EDNA & ENSEMBLE
Your mama's welcoming the 60's
Oh, oh, oh,
oh, oh. Oh, oh, oh
Oh your mama's welcoming the 60's
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
Go, mama, go, go, go!
ENSEMBLE
Welcome to the 60's
Open the door
For the girl who has more,
She's a star...
Tracy, go, go, go!
(Tracy
re-enters in a matching outfit.)
ALL
Oh mama, welcome to the 60's
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. Oh, oh
Oh mama,
welcome to the 60's
Oh, oh. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. Oh
Go mama. Go, go, go!
Hey mama welcome to the 60's
KAMILAH
Welcome to the "6", to the "0"
To the apostrophe "s"!
ALL
Hey mama welcome to the 60's
(JUDINE
riffs.)
ALL
Hey mama welcome to the 60's
(SHAYNA riffs.)
ALL
Welcome to the 60's
Go mama
go, go, go!
DYNAMITES
Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh, oh. Oh, oh
Oh, oh. Oh, oh, oh
Go mama, go, go, go!!
RUN AND TELL THAT
SEAWEED
Hey Tracy, my mom is hosting a platter party up on North Avenue. Wanna "check it out"?
PENNY
May I also come "check it out"?
SEAWEED
Oh, you surely may!
TRACY
I've never been to North
Avenue!
LINK
Ya think it'll be safe for, you know... us?
SEAWEED
Yeah,don't worry cracker
boy, it's cool!
PENNY
Being invited places by colored people!
TRACY
It feels so hip!
SEAWEED
I'm glad you feel that way, friends, 'cause not everybody does.
I can't see
Why people look at me
And
only see the color of my face
And then there's those
That try to help, god knows
But have to always put me
in my place
Now I won't ask you to be color blind
'Cause if you pick the fruit
Then girl, you're sure
to find...
The blacker the berry
The sweeter the juice
I could say it ain't so
But darlin', what's the
use?
The darker the chocolate
The richer the taste
And that's where it's at...
...now run and tell that!!
ENSEMBLE
Run and tell that!
SEAWEED
Run and tell that!
ENSEMBLE
Run and tell that!
SEAWEED
(& ENSEMBLE)
I can't see
Why people disagree
Each time I tell them what I know is true
And
if you come
And see the world I'm from
I bet your heart is gonna feel it too
Yeah. I could lie
But
baby. Let's be bold
Vanillajian be nice
But if the truth be told...
The blacker the berry
The sweeter
the juice
I could say it ain't so
But darlin', what's the use
The darker the chocolate
The richer the
taste
That's where it's at
Now run and tell that!!
ENSEMBLE
Run and tell that!
(The scene shifts
to Motormouth Maybelle's record shop
dance party where her daughter Li'l Inez and her friends are already in full swing.)
LI'L INEZ
Hey, you're Tracy
Turnblad! You're my favorite dancer on the Corny Collins Show.
SEAWEED
This is my sister, Li'l Inez.
TRACY
Sure.
I saw you at the auditions.
LI'L INEZ
Well, you're the only one who
did, 'cause they kicked me out
on my
young, gifted and black
behind.
SEAWEED
Tell 'em girl!
LI'L INEZ
I'm tired of coverin' up all my pride
SEAWEED
& ENSEMBLE
So give me five on the black-hand side
LI'L INEZ
I've got a new way of movin'
And I got
my own voice
SEAWEED & ENSEMBLE
So how can I help
But to shout and rejoice
LI'L INEZ
The people
'round here
Can barely pay their rent
They're "try'n to make dollar
Out 'a fifteen cent"
But we got a spirit
Money just cant buy
LI'L INEZ & ENSEMBLE
It's deep as a river
And soars to the sky!!
SEAWEED
& ENSEMBLE
I cant see
The reason it cant be
The kinda world where we all get our chance
The time is now
And we can show them how
To turn the music up and let's all dance
'Cause all things are equal
When it comes
to love
Well, that ain't quite true
'Cause when push comes to shove...
The blacker the berry
The sweeter
the juice
I could say it ain't so
But darlin', what's the use
The darker the chocolate
The richer the taste
That's where it's at
SEAWEED
...Now run and tell that!!
ENSEMBLE
Run and tell that!
SEAWEED
Run
and tell that!!
BIG, BLONDE AND BEAUTIFUL
MOTORMOUTH
Once upon a time
Girl I was just like you
Never let my extra large
Largesse
shine through
Hair was brown and nappy
Never had no fun
I hid under a bushel
Which is easier said than
done!
Then one day my grandma
Who was big and stout
She said you gotta love yourself
From inside out
And
just as soon as I learned
How to strut my funky stuff
I found out that the world at large
Cant get enough so...
Bring on that pecan pie
Pour some sugar on it
Sugar don't be shy
Scoop me up a mess
Of that chocolate
swirl
Don't be stingy,
I'm a growing girl
I offer big love
With no apology
How can i deny the
world
The most of me
I am not afraid
To throw my weight around
Pound by pound by pound
Because I'm
Big, blonde and beautiful
There is nothin' 'bout me
That's unsuitable
No one wants a meal
That only
offers the least
When girl we're servin' up
The whole damn feast
Slice off a piece
Of that hog head cheese
Then take a look inside
My book of recipes
Now, don't you sniff around
For something fluffy and light
I need a man who brings
A man-size... Appetite
I'll use a pinch of sugar
And a dash of spice
I'll
let ya lick the spoon
Because it tastes so nice
I'll keep it in my oven
'Til it's good and hot
Keep on
stirring til it hits the spot
Because I'm...
Big, blonde and beautiful
And Edna girl, you're lookin' so
Recruitable
Why sit in the bleachers
Timid and afraid
When Edna,
You can be your own parade!
TRACY
So? How
'bout it, Mama?
EDNA
Well, I am big, I am blonde... ish, and if you say
I'm beautiful, I guess I'm beautiful.
ALright, I'll do it!
ALL
Yeaaa!
Look out old Baltimore
We're marching in
'And we ain't shufflin'
Through
that old back door
EDNA
And Tracy, I will join the fight
If i can keep up this pace
WILBUR
And
girls, I'll be right at your side
If i can find some space
MOTORMOUTH
So you can
Hold your head up
Just
as big as ya please
You know they'll hear me knockin'
With the two of these!
MOTORMOUTH & ENSEMBLE
Tomorrow,
side by side
We'll show the world what's right
EDNA
Looks like I'm touchin' up my roots tonight!
MOTORMOUTH
& ENSEMBLE
Then we'll be
Big, blonde and beautiful
It's time to face the fact
It's irrefutable
Can't
ya hear that rumbling?
That's our hunger to be free
It's time to fin'ly taste
Equality
COUNCIL MOTHERS
& DAUGHTERS
On mother/daughter day
Where thin is in,
We're white as wool
MOTORMOUTH
Well ladies,
big is back!
And as for black, it's...
MOTORMOUTH & ENSEMBLE
...Beautiful!!
MOTORMOUTH
All shapes
and sizes, follow me
EDNA
Let's bust their chops!
VELMA
Quick, cali the cops!
MOTORMOUTH &
PROTESTERS
We're gonna dance our way to victory!
And get us on TV!
PROTESTERS
2...4...6...8...TV'S got to
integrate!
COUNCIL MEMBERS
Stay away! This isn't Negro Day!
(Police sirens wail. Whistles blow. As the protesters
continue their march, they are loaded into the addy wagon.)
MOTORMOUTH
You bet I'm big!
EDNA (pulling on
Velmas hair)
This blond is gray!
LINK
Tracy, this was beautiful!
MOTORMOUTH
Big, blonde, and beautiful
leads the way!
ENSEMBLE
No one's getting on TV today!
THE BIG DOLLHOUSE
WOMEN
I gotta get out
I gotta get out
I gotta get out
How'd I get in this slammer
This
cooler
This big dollhouse!
MATRON
Alright, ladies, welcome to the "Big Dollhouse!" For those of you new to the
Baltimore Women's House of Detention, think of me as a mother... one who eats her young!
VELMA
Locked up with all
these
Lowlife women
EDNA
And horizontal stripes
Ain't exactly slimmin'
AMBER
Is there anybody
here
Who can dry clean my blouse?
MATRON
It's the maid's day off
ALL
In the big oollhouse
LI'L
INEZ
Lady justice,
Where have you gone?
EDNA
Ооh, Wilbur, check,
I think I left the iron
on!
VELMA
Did you see Corny laughing?
I could murder that louse!
MATRON
Honey, that'll getcha life
HOOKERS
In
the big dollhouse
ALL
Big house!
VELMA
Locked up here in the pen
ALL
Big house!
AMBER
No
phone!
EDNA
No food!
MOTORMOUTH
No men!
EDNA
I need a conjugal visit
From my loving spouse
MATRON
Honey, just drop the soap
ALL
In The Big Dollhouse
EDNA (to Matron)
Yoo hoo,
My
stomach's a little sour
I haven't had food
In over an hour
MATRON
You just had a pizza,
Six burgers,
a mouse!
ALL
There's no food left
In the big dollhouse
VELMA
Hey, matron,
I have got to complain
HOOKER
Mira, mami, don't I know you
From 1st and main?
VELMA
Eek, call my attorneys
Lipshitz
and strauss
I gotta get sprung
From the big dollhouse
ALL
Big house!
LITTLE INEZ
No fair!
EDNA
No food!
PENNY
No fun!
ALL
Big house!
MOTORMOUTH
And our fight had just
begun
'Cause it's freedom's flame
Velma'd like to douse
So we must break out of this
ALL
Big Dollhouse
TRACY
Penny, I can't take
All this waiting
I've lost my man
Plus, my hair's deflating!
PENNY
Well Tracy,
I hate to grumble or grouse
ALL (screaming at Tracy)
But it's your fault that we're in
This
big dollhouse!!
BEATNIK CHICK
Hey, cool it, ladies
No need to shout
And don't ya got an old man
To
bail you out?
VELMA
Ha! Her daddy's a pervert,
A loser, a souse!
EDNA (pawing Velma)
Well, it's
iust us girls
In the big dollhouse
ALL
Big house!
AMBER
God, I'm too young to fry!
ALL
Big house!
EDNA
I'm busting out!
MOTORMOUTH
Girl, so am I!
ALL
Lady justice, hear
my plea
'Cause the big dollhouse
The big dollhouse
The big dollhouse
Ain't big enough for me!
For me!
For me!
EDNA
For me!!!
(YOU'RE) TIMELESS
WILBUR
Styles keep a changin'
The world's re-arrangin'
But Edna, you're timeless to me
Hemlines
are shorter
A beer costs a quarter
But time cannot take what comes free
You're like a stinky old cheese, babe
Just
gettin' riper with age
You're like a fatal disease, babe
But there's no cure
So let this fever rage
Some
folks can't stand it
Say time is a bandit
But I take the opposite view
Cause when I need a lift
Time
brings a gift
Another day with you
A twist or a waltz
It's all the same schmaltz
With just a change in the
scenery
You'll never be old hat
That's that!
You're timeless to me
EDNA
Oh, Wilbur!
Fads keep
a-fadin'
Castro's invading!
But wilbur, you're timeless to me
Hairdos are higher
Mine feels like barbed wire
But
you say I'm chic as can be!
You're like a rare vintage ripple
A vintage they'll never forget
So pour me a teeny
weenie triple
And we can toast the fact we ain't dead yet!
I can't stop eating
Your hairline's receding
Soon
there'll be nothing at all
So, you'll wear a wig
While I roast a pig
Hey! Pass that geritol
Glenn miller
had class
That chubby checker's a gas
But they all pass eventually
You'll never be passe
Hip hooray!
You're
timeless to me
(They dance.)
EDNA
You're like a broken down chevy
All you need is a fresh coat of paint
WILBUR
And
Edna, you got me goin' hot and heavy
You're fat and old, but baby, boring you ain't!
WILBUR & EDNA
Some
folks don't get it
But we never fret it
'Cause we know that time is our friend
It's plain to see
That you're
stuck with me
Until the bitter end
And we got a kid
Who's blowin' the lid
Off the turnblad family tree
EDNA
You'll always hit the spot
Big shot!
You're timeless to me
WILBUR
You'll always be du
jour
Mon amour
You're timeless to me
EDNA
You'll always be first string
WILBUR
Ring-a-ding-ding!
WILBUR & EDNA
You're timeless to me
EDNA
You're timeless to me
WILBUR
You're timeless
to me
WILBUR & EDNA
You're timeless to me!!
WITHOUT LOVE
SEAWEED
(climbing in Penny's window)
Psst Penny! What happened?!
PENNY (strapped into bed)
My mother's punishing me for going to jail without permission!
SEAWEED
Well, I'm here to save the fair maiden
in her tower.
PENNY
Oh, Seaweed!
LINK (sneaking into jail)
Tracy, you took beautiful behind bars!
TRACY
It must be the low-watt instutional lighting!
LINK
Oh Tracy, they can keep us from kissing,
but they can't stop us from singing!
LINK
Once I was a selfish fool
Who never understood
I never
looked inside myself
Though on the outside, I looked good!
Then we met and you made me
The man I
am today
Tracy, I'm in love with you
No matter what you weigh
'Cause...
LINK (& ENSEMBLE)
Without
love
Life is uke the seasons with
No summer
Without love
Life is rock 'n' roll without
A drummer
Tracy,
I'll be yours forever
'Cause I never wanna be
Without love
Tracy, never set me free
No, I ain't
lyin'
Never set me free, Tracy,
No, no, no!!
TRACY
Once I was a simple girl
Then stardom came
to me
But I was still a nothing
Though a thousand fans may
Disagree
ENSEMBLE
Tracy!!
TRACY
Fame was just a prison
Signing autographs a bore
I didn't have a clue
'Til you came banging on my door
TRACY
(& ENSEMBLE)
That without love
Life is like my dad without his bromo
Without love
Life is making out with
perry como!
Darling, I'll be yours forever
'Cause I never wanna be
Without love
So darling, throw away
the key
LINK & TRACY
I'm yours forever
TRACY
Throw away the key
LINK, TRACY& ENSEMBLE
Yeah,
yeah, yeah!
SEAWEED
Living in the ghetto
Black is everywhere ya go
Who'd 've thought I'd love a girl
With
skin as white as winter's snow
PENNY
In my ivory tower
Life was just a hostess snack
But now I've tasted
chocolate
And i'm never going back
PENNY & SEAWEED & ENSEMBLE
'Cause without love
SEAWEED
Life
is like a beat that you can't follow
PENNY & SEAWEED & ENSEMBLE
Without love
PENNY
Life is Doris
Day at the apollo
PENNY & SEAWEED & ENSEMBLE
Darling, I'll be yours forever
'Cause I never wanna
be
Without love
SEAWEED
So darling, never set me free
PENNY & SEAWEED
I'm yours forever
Never
set me free
PENNY & SEAWEED & ENSEMBLE
No, no, no!
LINK
If you're locked up in this prison, trace
I don't know what I'll do
TRACY
Link, I've got to break out
So that I can get my hands on you
SEAWEED
And
girl, if I can't touch you
Now I'm gonna lose control
PENNY
Seaweed, you're my black white knight
I've
found my blue-eyed soul
SEAWEED & ENSEMBLE
Sweet freedom is our goal
LINK
Trace, I wanna kiss
ya!
TRACY
Then I can't wait for parole!
(Link & Seaweed break their girls out of their respective
prisons and continue singing... of course)
ALL
'Cause without love
SEAWEED
Life is like a prom that won't
invite us
ALL
Without love
LINK
Life's getting my big break and laryngitis
ALL
Without love
PENNY
Life's a '45' when you can't buy it
ALL
Without love
TRACY
Life is like my mother on a diet
ALL
Like a week that's only mondays
Only ice cream never sundaes
Like a circle with no center
Like
a door marked "do not enter!"
DARLING, I'LL BE YOURS FOREVER
'Cause I never wanna be...
Without love
PENNY & LINK
Ys now you've captured me
ENSEMBLE
Without love
SEAWEED & TRACY
I
surrender happily
ENSEMBLE
Without love
PENNY
Oh seaweed
ALL
Never set me free
PENNY
& SEAWEED
No, no, no
TRACY & LINK
No, I ain't lyin'
PENNY & SEAWEED
Never set
me free
ALL
No, no, no
No, I dont wanna live without
PENNY
Love, love, love
LINK
Yeah, yeah, yeah
ALL
Darling, you had best believe me,
Never leave me without love!
I KNOW WHERE I'VE BEEN
MOTORMOUTH
There's a light
In the darkness
Though the night
Is black as my skin
There's
a light
Burning bright
Showing me the way
But I know where i've been
There's a cry
In the distance
It's a voice
That comes from deep within
There's a cry
Asking why
I pray the answer's up ahead
'Cause
i know where i've been
There's a road
We've been travelin'
Lost so many on the way
But the riches
Will
be plenty
Worth the price we
Had to pay
There's a dream
In the future
There's a struggle
We have
yet to win
And there's pride
In my heart
'Cause I know
Where I'm going
And I know where i've
been
MOTORMOUTH & ENSEMBLE
There's a road
We must travel
There's a promise
We
must make
'Cause the riches
Will be plenty
Worth the risk
And chances that we take
There's a dream
In
the future
There's a struggle
We have yet to win
Use that pride
In our hearts
To lift us up
To
tomorrow
'Cause just to sit still
Would be a sin
ENSEMBLE
I know it, I know it
I know where
i'm going
MOTORMOUTH
And lord knows I know..
Where I've been
MOTORMOUTH & ENSEMBLE
Oh!
When we win,
I'll give thanks to my god
'Cause I know where i've been
(IT'S) HAIRSPRAY
CORNY
And now, live, from the certified up-to-code Baltimore Eventorium...
...for the first time
ever on nationwide television...
it's The Corny Collins Spectacular...
COUNCIL GIRLS
He's Corny!!
CORNY
...brought
to you by Ultra Clutch Hairspray!
CORNY (& ENSEMBLE)
What gives a girl
Power and punch?
Is it charm,
is it poise?
No, it's hairspray!
What gets a gal
Asked out to lunch
Is it brains, is it dough?
No,
it's hairspray!
If you take a ride
With no can at your side
Then your flip will be gone
With the wind
But if you spray it and lock it,
You can take off in a rocket
And in outer space
Each hair will be in
place
Why take a chance
When you get up and dance
If you twist, I insist
You use hairspray
And
tell your mother
Her head she should smother
With "ultra-clutch" faithfully
So if you're a redhead,
A blonde
or brunette
Just take my advice
And you might just get
The only thing better than hairspray
CORNY
That's
me!
ENSEMBLE
Ska-doo-dle-e-ya
Doo-dle-e-ya do wah
CORNY
Forget the milkman
The only thing
better than hairspray
ENSEMBLE
Hairspray! Wow!
CORNY
That's me!
CORNY & ENSEMBLE
What
makes a man
Reach out and touch?
Ultra clutch!
CORNY & ENSEMBLE
So if you're a redhead,
A blonde
or brunette
Just take my advice
And you might just get
CORNY
The only thing better than hairspray
That's
me!
ENSEMBLE
Ska-doo-dle-e-ya
Doo-dle-e-ya do wah
COUNCIL GIRLS
He's Corny Collins!
CORNY
The
only thing better than hairspray
ENSEMBLE
Hairspray! Wow!
CORNY
That's me!
ENSEMBLE
Ska-doo-dle-e-ya
do wah
Ska-doo-dle-e-ya do wah!
Do wow!
CORNY
"Hey, baby, you look like you could use a stiff one!"
BRENDA
Ska-doo-dle-e-ya-do
do wah!!!!
COOTIES
AMBER
Tracy Turnblad, this is for you.
They came from way far out
In outer space
And with
her help
They may destroy the human race
AMBER & GUYS
She's got cooties!
GIRLS
...Cooties
AMBER
They've
found a place to nest
GUYS
She's got cooties
GIRLS
...Cooties
AMBER
If i were her i'd be depressed
Long tailed, sharp nailed
Fuzzy legs, laying eggs
"Eww, get 'em away from me,
get 'em away from me ...
ewww!!"
In science class
She's like a walking show-and-tell
Her pet skunk ran away
'Cause it couldn't take
the smell
GUYS
She's got cooties
GIRLS
...Cooties
AMBER
Nobody want to sit by her
GUYS
She's
got cooties
GIRLS
...Cooties
AMBER
She don't need a coat
'Cause she's got fur!
Circle, circle,
ALL
Dot,
dot, dot
AMBER
Hurry, get your cootie shot!
"Come on everybody, let's stamp 'em out!"
GUYS
She's got
cooties
GIRLS
...Cooties
AMBER
She's just as friendly as can be
GUYS
She's got cooties
GIRLS
...Cooties
AMBER
She
shows them cootie hospitality
GUYS
She's got cooties
GIRLS
...Cooties
AMBER
She's like a living
"twilight zone"
GUYS
She's got cooties
GIRLS
...Cooties
AMBER
Quick, get rod serling on the
phone!
AMBER
Black, white, red, green
AMBER & ENSEMBLE
Every color in between
AMBER
Dresses
like a circus clown
AMBER & ENSEMBLE
Somebody oughta hose her down
AMBER
Grew up in a cootie zoo
I
bet her two-ton mama's got 'em too!
"And that's for you!"
YOU CAN'T STOP THE BEAT
TRACY
You cant stop an avalanche
As it races down the hill
You can try to stop the seasons, girl
But
ya know you never will
And you can try to stop my dancin' feet
But I just cannot stand still
'Cause the
world keeps spinning
'Round and 'round
And my heart's keeping time
To the speed of sound
I was lost til I
heard the drums
Then I found my way
TRACY & LINK
'Cause you can't stop the beat
Ever since this
old world began
A woman found out if she shook it
She could shake up a man
And so I'm gonna shake and shimmy it
The best that I can today
'Cause you cant stop
The motion of the ocean
Or the sun in the sky
You
can wonder if you wanna
But I never ask why
And if you try to hold me down
I'm gonna spit in your eye
and say
That you cant stop the beat!
(Penny appears onstage transformed into a hot teenage tigress.)
TRACY
What
do ya' have to say, Penny?
PENNY
I am now a checkerboard chick!
You can't stop a river
As it rushes to the
sea
You can try and stop the hands of time
But ya know it just can't be
And if they try to stop us, seaweed,
I'll
call the n - double-a - с - p!
'Cause the world keeps spinning
'Round and 'round.
SEAWEED
'Round and
'round
PENNY
And my heart's keeping time
To the speed of sound
SEAWEED
Speed of sound
PENNY
I
was lost till I heard the drums
Then I found my way
PENNY & SEAWEED
'Cause you can't stop the
beat
PENNY & SEAWEED, TRACY & LINK
Ever since we first saw the light
A man and woman liked to shake it
On
a saturday night
And so I'm gonna shake and shimmy it
With all my might today
'Cause you cant stop
The motion
of the ocean
Or the rain from above
They can try to stop the paradise
We're dreaming of
But they cannot stop
the rhythm
Of two hearts in love to stay
'Cause you cant stop the beat!
EDNA
Tracy, I have a little something
I'd
like to add, if you don't mind.
You cant stop my happiness
'Cause I like the way I am
And you just can't
stop my knife and fork
When I see a christmas ham
So if you don't like the way I look
Well, I just
don't give a damn!
EDNA & ENSEMBLE
'Cause the world keeps spinning
'Round and 'round
And my heart's keeping
time
To the speed of sound
I was lost til I heard the drums
Then I found my way
EDNA & WILBUR
& COMPANY
'Cause you cant stop the beat
Ever since this old world began
A woman found out if she shook it
She
could shake up a man
And so I'm gonna shake and shimmy it
The best that I can today
'Cause you cant stop
The
motion of the ocean
Or the sun in the sky
You can wonder if you wanna
But I never ask why
And if you try
to hold me down
I'm gonna spit in your eye and say
That you cant stop the beat!
EDNA
Wilbur, be a dear and
get me my
oxygen... NOW!
MOTORMOUTH (to Velma)
Step aside, Miss Buttercup... it's
time to wrap this mutha'
up!
Oh, oh, oh,
You can't stop today
ENSEMBLE
...No!
MOTORMOUTH
As it comes speeding down the
track
ENSEMBLE
Oон оон оон, child, yes
MOTORMOUTH
Child,
yesterday is hist'ry
ENSEMBLE
Be gone!
MOTORMOUTH
And it's never coming back
ENSEMBLE
Look ahead
MOTORMOUTH
& ENSEMBLE
'Cause tomorrow is a brand new day
MOTORMOUTH
And it don't know white from black
ENSEMBLE
Yeah!
MOTORMOUTH
& ENSEMBLE
'Cause the world keeps spinning
'Round and 'round
And my heart's keeping time
To the speed of
sound
I was lost til I heard the drums
Then I found my way
'Cause you cant stop the beat
ALL
Ever
since we first saw the light
A man and woman liked to shake it
On a saturday night
And so I'm gonna shake and shimmy
it
With all my might today
'Cause you can't stop
The motion of the ocean
Or the rain from above
They can
try to stop ths paradise
We're dreaming of
But you cannot stop the rhythm
Of two hearts in love to stay
You
can't stop the beat!
Aah, aah, aah
Aah, aah, aah
Aah, aah, aah
Come on, you von tussles
Go on, shake
your fanny muscles
VELMA & AMBER
We can't!
ALL
Yes, you can!
VELMA & AMBER
No, we can't!
ALL
Yes,
you can!
VEIMA & AMBER
Yes, we can...!!!
ALL
You can't stop the beat
VELMA & AMBER
Ever
since we first saw the sun
It seems von tussle girls are always
Tryin' to please someone
But now we're gonna shake
and shimmy it
And have some fun
Today!
ALL
'Cause you can't stop
The motion of the ocean
Or the
rain from above
They can try to stop the paradise
We're dreaming of
But you cannot stop the rhythm
Of two hearts
in love to stay
'Cause you can't stop the beat!
You can't stop the beat!!
You can't stop the beat!!!
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